Jiya Kohar Week 13: Shortest High Known to Man
I am extremely grateful for some specific experiences. The Proustian memory effect describes the phenomenon where a smell suddenly brings back a vivid memory, even from years ago.
Words cannot describe the genuine awe I feel when I experience smell evoked memories. Crayons, old textbooks, cleaning products, closets, markers, old perfume are all things that can suddenly teleport me through years and dimensions. Unexpected memories that were completely forgotten suddenly get rejuvenated and flood my nervous system until I find myself trying to smell every last air particle in the room, only to relive the memory temporarily. Who knew that stepping into my backyard shed would actually transport me to my second grade school Christmas party?
However, it’s also a short term euphoria. It’s almost like this alien, mythical drug with the shortest high known to man. It springs up with no warning and forces you to momentarily travel back in time, only to bring you back just as fast. It’s so peculiar how a singular smell can result in memories being unlocked that you had forgotten. It feels strange that a part of my brain is just waiting for a small clue to latch onto and explode with my past.
It’s deeply frustrating too. Initially, I have this strong recollection of the memory, though seconds later it disappears. And, because the more you smell something the less potent it becomes, I’m usually forced to sit with this new world that’s fading by the second, until I’m left with a shell of a memory. It’s surreal how an aspect of your life can somehow catch you by surprise, even though YOU experienced those moments yourself.
Therefore, sometimes I grapple with the question of whether my childhood version counts as a different person than today (mentally/emotionally).
We all change exponentially, especially in our teenage years. If we grow so much in such a short time, then the person we once were can seem completely different. Though I obviously share much of my current self with my childhood self, there’s also major differences. The Proustian memory effect is a contributing factor to this thought. If it takes something external, like a smell, to unlock a memory of my younger self, then in a way it’s similar to being strangers. Strangers too have to rely on external cues, like communication, to become closer with each other. I feel like that also applies to this situation.
Inversely, it’s also such a beautiful thing. There’s something so special about being able to connect with your past and I think this can also prove how similar I am to myself across time. I am the only person in the world who can relive this specific memory because of this specific smell. To others, this smell means nothing, but to me it emanates emotions that transcend space and time. So, even if we’ve changed a lot, those memories prove we are still heavily connected. And, maybe, these memories are how I communicate with my younger self.
Hi Jiya!
ReplyDeleteI thought that this blog was extremely insightful. I am a deeply nostalgic person, and I find myself getting transported back in time way more often than I should with different smells, sounds, or feelings. One specific sensation that I have been seeking since it happened is a touch sensation. When I was in middle school, I remember waking up from a wonderfully life-altering nap, and in the blissful half-asleep state that I was in, I think I touched my blanket? It may have been something else, but it was hard and soft at the same time, and weirdly enough, it transferred me to another nostalgic memory from my childhood.
I also find myself going into my closet to smell some of my old perfumes. It sounds really weird, but I enjoy thinking about the person I was and the things that were going on in my life when I used to wear certain scents on a daily basis. This is actually a reason why I tend to wear perfume every day and switch up the scent annually. To me, it is almost like my own scent scrapbook as I can go back and reminisce on the different versions of me.
About your comment on whether or not your childhood self is the same, you are actually a completely different version of yourself on a cellular level. Every cell in your body tends to regenerate within a span of seven years, so that's really cool to think about. I also believe that you, as a kid and you as a young adult are still somewhat the same person mentally, as you still hold the same core values. I actually learned about this in my psych class today! Due to the different stages of development (think of it like the hierarchy of needs) you need to fulfill one task from each stage to progress from the next. I really enjoyed this week’s post!
Hello, Jiya! It’s interesting to hear about how you view your younger self. I don’t have any particularly strong memories of my younger self, so it’s interesting to see how you have such strong connections to your previous experiences. I don’t really have any smells that make me recall any strong memories, but I do have something similar with specific tastes (that’s probably why I love food so much)!
ReplyDeleteI also found your description of smell being the link to your memory fascinating. It certainly is true, I often find myself forgetting memories I treasure from a couple years back. It’s only the exceptionally strong ones that I remember, either through direct memory or a link. I don’t really feel bad for not remembering my memories, though. I just chalk it up to forgetting.
To me, it just feels like even though you might forget memories, they still remain in the little habits. I may not remember my first time making a sandwich all the time, but I love sandwiches, for no reason. I don’t really like medicine. Even though I forget all sorts of things, they never really go away. They just remain a part of me, in another form.
Hi Jiya, this was one of the most interesting blogs I have read over the course of the year. I never realized that there was a term that described a smell evoked by memory, but I can confidently tell you that I am a frequent victim to this. It’s annoying though, when a certain smell reminds me of a memory, but I can’t quite put my finger on it, it’s like it’s clawing at the surface but stays under the water no matter how hard I pull on it, if anything the harder I try to remember it the more confused I find myself. As teenagers we change so much in such a short amount of time it is amazing. We are influenced by so many factors, friends, social media, teachers, extracurriculars, but the one constant throughout all that changes is our memories. Memories are the foundation to our sense of self and honestly memories are what make life worth living. The short term euphoria, however fleeting it may be, motivates me to do my best to make more memories, to experience new things, things that I won’t forget and need a smell or sight to remember. The Proustian memory effect is a beautiful thing because throughout all the change that we go through, especially in the past few years it is really amazing to sit down and reflect when reminded of a memory of just how much has changed. Laugh and learn from the mistakes, cherish the good times, be reminded of that friend you haven’t seen in a while and pick up the phone and call them. Also, the fact that something as small as a scent can transport us back years into the past demonstrates the power of our memories and how they always stick with us, some more prevalent than others, but it is also a testament to the way we live our lives reminding us that there is always room to make more memories that we can cherish years from now.
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