Jiya Kohar Week 15: Open (Closed) House (Closet)
This past week, I was randomly reminded of an open house I attended with my parents when I was much younger. I have no idea where exactly it was (aside from somewhere in the Bay Area), but it was a very beautiful neighborhood and a very sunny day. While I started exploring the quintessentially American home, I stumbled into the room of, presumably, the teenage son. I don’t remember much of the actual room, but I do remember how, walking into the walk-in closet, I was greeted by a plethora of games, boxes, clothes, and other memorabilia. Curious, I opened a small cardboard box, thinking of how intricate the home staging was, allowing potential homeowners to really envision themselves being able to live in this house. However, opening the flap, I was exposed to many Polaroids of a teenage boy from many different stages of life and settings. I saw his entire life from a young boy to young adult, with friends and family, in school and at home. I remember a specific one of him sitting on the hood of his car, wearing a dark blue UCSC hoodie. I was so confused. Feeling invasive, I put away the box, stared at the rest of the closet, realizing it was real and went back downstairs to join my parents. Being so young, I didn’t think much of it then, but it clearly stuck with me enough to be remembered years later. Though my memory is not as clear, I can still briefly remember the bruised Monopoly and Jenga boxes, collection of Polos and dark blue walls.
I’m genuinely so confused as to why the closet was left untouched, especially during a literal home showing. I don’t understand the creative decision of leaving all belongings of this boy in the closet, because I’m sure at least one person had to have noticed it before letting the home be shown. Regardless, to my point, in that moment, I felt like I had deeply violated this man’s privacy, though not intentionally. Though it was a dramatic response, looking back, it definitely made me feel creepy and weird.
Something so personal and private, that I’m (pretty) sure he didn’t want completely open for everyone to see, was there, open to any and everyone. Maybe the fact I didn’t know him amplified the feeling, or maybe I was just projecting. I mean, I would be so upset if random people were given unlimited access to my old room and private possessions. It also confuses me why I still remember this moment years later, or why I can’t remember anything else except for that moment. I also wonder why it was such a big deal to me.
Zooming in on the picture of a (around) 18 year old boy sat on the hood of his car, surrounded by his friends, I wonder where he is now and the mystery behind if he ever found his way back to the polaroid I had been staring at then.
I’m genuinely so confused as to why the closet was left untouched, especially during a literal home showing. I don’t understand the creative decision of leaving all belongings of this boy in the closet, because I’m sure at least one person had to have noticed it before letting the home be shown. Regardless, to my point, in that moment, I felt like I had deeply violated this man’s privacy, though not intentionally. Though it was a dramatic response, looking back, it definitely made me feel creepy and weird.
Something so personal and private, that I’m (pretty) sure he didn’t want completely open for everyone to see, was there, open to any and everyone. Maybe the fact I didn’t know him amplified the feeling, or maybe I was just projecting. I mean, I would be so upset if random people were given unlimited access to my old room and private possessions. It also confuses me why I still remember this moment years later, or why I can’t remember anything else except for that moment. I also wonder why it was such a big deal to me.
Zooming in on the picture of a (around) 18 year old boy sat on the hood of his car, surrounded by his friends, I wonder where he is now and the mystery behind if he ever found his way back to the polaroid I had been staring at then.
Hello, Jiya! I loved reading your blog this week. I can’t really put it into words, but I guess I just really liked the mood of your blog. Your blog feels more personal, more expressive than normal. It might just be me, but I think it’s kind of a departure from your usual writing style, and I’m all for it.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I also have a pretty bad memory. It’s kind of reassuring to hear that it’s not just me that remembers random things from random times. I also don’t like people going through my stuff, but I kinda feel that the person in the picture wouldn’t care that you saw them all that. After all, those pictures were left behind, and he probably forgot about them. Photos are a great way to keep track of all sorts of memories, but maybe once in a while, they’re meant to be forgotten, just like memories are.
Hi Jiya, your blog this week was really interesting. It definitely took me in a direction that I didn’t expect and it was really interesting to see what your perspective of the event was. Privacy is such a complicated yet simple idea, yet everyone seems to have their own opinions and parameters set around it. Open houses are some of my favorite events to attend with my family, even though we know that we have no intention of putting in an offer because it provides an opportunity to see what an alternate reality would look like. I am also wondering how so many personal belongings got left behind in a house that would have had multiple people walk through it before opening it up for other people to come view, but another way to think about it is some people cope best when they ignore their past or forget about it. It’s funny how our brains work, remembering the most random things from a specific memory. We don’t know why we remember the things we remember, but in their own ways they all hold significance in little nuggets of life lessons. More than anything, I think you learned something about yourself that day, the kind of person you are: respectful and private. I’m not much of a polaroid person myself, I’ve found that they are a little inconvenient at most times, I am partial to digi cam photos, but polaroids do feel like something worth holding onto. Who knows, maybe that mystery teenager didn’t even realize that they were missing, or it was intentional to leave behind and close a chapter of his life with the sale of his old home, I guess we’ll never know.
ReplyDeleteI’ve never attended an open house before, but I have been to a few estate sales and during quite a few of those sales I experienced similar situations. There’s nothing quite as uncomfortable as accidentally seeing into a person’s private life, especially the private life of people you don’t know. I also wonder why they didn’t clear out the personal items from the house before opening it for a bunch of random people to see.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if the boy himself was the one who filled the closet, or if someone shoved all of those things in the closet for some unknown reason. Maybe they felt the need to put the boy’s things away and thought the closet would be the most convenient place to put it.