Good Bye and Good Riddance - Ranvir Thapar Week 16
I cannot bring myself to study after AP tests. Maybe because they felt like finals, or I studied like never before to prepare and have no mental capacity left to spare, but I am done. Then I realize, I have some finals and presentations to prepare and give and steel myself to do work, again.
Junior year was everything everyone told me it would be, and somehow it was worse. This was one of the few things I wish was overhyped, but in all honesty was underhyped. I thought people were joking and trolling when they talked about the horrors of their junior year. I always told myself their problems were born out of their habitual procrastination and it was all avoidable. So imagine my surprise to find out the never ending work load, the constant decline of grades, and the lack of motivation to get out of bed every morning. Junior year was hell.
But now that I’m on the other side (or basically on the other side at this point), I have to admit, it was worth it.
Did I learn valuable life skills?
Yes.
Did I learn that once you're at rock bottom the only way to go is up?
Yes.
Did I find an amazing group of friends?
Definitely.
Do I have any regrets?
Many, but not for lack of trying.
As I look back on my junior year, there are a few things that will stick with me until the day I die. The late night conversations with my friends where we were trying to figure out why we were awake at 2 am studying for a test that we wouldn’t even remember 5 years from now. The dark jokes and sad nights as a collective depression came over us every time we opened our Aeries. I’ll be grateful for the people I got close with, the friends who I consider family, the trust, the smiles, the laughter and the connections. As bad as junior year was, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Hello, Ranvir! Honestly, just from your title, I was prepared to go on a long-winded spiel about how great APENG was this year. I did read your blog, though. I must thank you for how every time I read your blogs, it’s just so relatable. Every time I read a blog written by you, it’s so easy to try and continue on the topic. APENG certainly was worth it. I didn’t like the class at first, but it really was an experience. Nothing quite compares to how much APENG has taught me.
ReplyDeleteOn the note of laziness, I guess the term for what you’re describing is called “junioritis.” I personally don’t believe in stuff like “junioritis” and “senioritis,” terms that make it seem like this is a special trait to juniors and seniors. I do believe in the fact that nobody likes to work, and since we’ve finished the hardest tasks, it’s natural to relax a bit. Who cares now? We’ve finished APs! Everything else is going to be easy now! Who doesn’t want to relax? After all, we’ve got college applications to do in a couple of months. Let’s just relax for a couple of weeks, to prepare for the bigger hurdle that’s ahead.
Junior jumpscare hit me so hard that I feel like just melting away on my chair for this last week. Screw all these assignments, I’ve worked so hard this entire year, just give me my break early!!! But it’s also that thought that makes me resist against the deadly sin of sloth and slowly type away my final projects. What was it that the track kids say? Finish on empty? Actually I wouldn’t know, I haven’t ran in so long.
ReplyDeleteThose late night conversations are definitely more memorable than the numerous tests that I still failed after studying. Actually, thinking about it, it’s already been wiped from my memory. I also remember thinking that I was going to be better than these once juniors now seniors at the beginning of the year. “I’ll sleep early, AND get all my work done in a timely manner. I’m going to lock in so hard!” Oh dear. I might even be worse than them. Junior year really felt like an endless purgatory. There was a period where I checked Aeries more than my messages, something that I really hope doesn’t ever happen again. But hey, even though this journey through hell was exhausting, it was also the year where I managed to fix my bum self.
Thank you Ranvir! I really enjoyed having you in my AP Lang class this year. I can’t count the times you made me laugh, either in class, or while reading your blogs, that are always so relatable. Even when everyone else was drowning in APENG misery, you always managed to lighten the mood—please don’t ever stop being your radiant self 😛
When it comes to testing schedules, it does kind of feel like they are setting us up to maximize exhaustion. Having AP testing just before finals is honestly a nightmare combo, and I can heavily relate to your exhaustion about still having to study for finals after wrapping up AP testing. There’s so much work to be done, but so little time to do it.
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to junior year, I never felt like it was overhyped, so I wonder what you heard about it and who told you. I was often told that junior year was the most stressful year because it’s when your classes start to be more serious, and it’s also the first year you can freely take AP classes, which are known for their difficulty.
As someone who is happy to say goodbye to junior year, I couldn’t help but smile at your post Ranvir. I definitely agree that the nightmares about this year were definitely underhyped. I have spent more time in my room doing work and stressing out over classes and tests than I did spending time with my family. In the first semester, I tried the whole “work hard play hard” thing, then I realized: that wont work this year. I really had to learn how to effectively study, and I think that was the most important lesson I learned this year. To let you in on a secret, you’re not lazy, I’ve honestly been mentally checked out from school since February, but unfortunately, I have the SAT next weekend, so I still have to grind it out for a couple of more days. I enjoyed having you as a classmate. Happy summer!
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